Pegging 101: A Beginner's Guide to Strap-On Play

You may have heard about ‘pegging’ in quiet conversations and wonder what the deal is. What is pegging, and how do you get started?

Pegging is a very specific sexual act that involves the use of a strap-on dildo and anal penetration. Though at first it started with anal sex performed on a man, pegging has evolved to cover all gender colors. Also, it may sound strange that the practice has amassed quite an audience, but not so much for those who are familiar with BDSM acts and similar power dynamic shifts in the bedroom.

So, if you’re reading this right now and want to learn more, we have a comprehensive pegging guide waiting just for you.

What Does Pegging Mean?

If you think the word ‘pegging’ came from the urban dictionary, you’d be right. Currently, pegging is an accepted term to describe anal penetration done by another person using a strap-on dildo. However, the sex act has evolved into several variations and sexes- virtually anyone who’s curious and wants to go further can get pegged with the right sex toys.

One thing to keep in mind is that pegging is best planned carefully. There’s a significant chance that pegging will be an uncomfortable experience if done spontaneously, especially for the receiver. So, before you even click that ‘buy now’ button on a strap-on dildo that you fancy, you should probably have the talk with your partner. This includes giving them enough time to consider if they want it, and accepting if their answer is a no.

When Did Pegging Exist?

The word ‘pegging’ was introduced to the world in 2001 by Dan Savage, an LGBT columnist. It was a term to describe a cis male partner and cisgender woman going at it with a strap-on. It’s largely defined by anal sex and strap-on toys- as long as you do these two things it’s legitimately a pegging act.

The idea of pegging spread not just within the LGBTQ community but throughout the world as well. There are several shows and movies that refer to the word, and now you can just search for it online, and voila! You get dozens of informative results.

Pegging can be a turn-on for couples who enjoy a shift in power dynamics. In the event that you’re both in the mood for BDSM play, pegging can give you that much-needed refresh to bring excitement back to the bedroom. Women can get a kick out of pegging as they have a chance to play the dom, while men can experience being on the submissive side every now and then.

Things You Need to Know Before Trying Pegging

Pegging is an accepted term nowadays- anybody who wants to try it are 100% welcome to do so. There’s a misconception that pegging equals lots and lots of poop, but this simply isn’t true. Waste materials are stored in the colon and won’t come out unless forced to. Otherwise, you might encounter some residue especially if you or your partner haven’t properly washed, but this can be easily resolved with a wet wipe or two.

Another thing to think about is the risk of acquiring STIs, or sexually transmitted diseases. To reduce the risk, we recommend using a condom over the dildo, using an oil-based lube, and changing condoms per anal hole penetrated. The anus is susceptible to microtears, hence the importance of going slow and steady.

Pegging is not gender-biased, which everyone can get pegged if they want. All it takes is another person, a strap-on and some background knowledge on how to prepare and do the act properly. This sexual act can even be elevated to include more people, e.g., in orgies and threesomes, to name a few.

What Do You Use in Pegging?

Lots of Lubricant

Going in an anus dry is not a good idea, whether you use a finger, a dildo, or an organic material (like a fruit or something). It just doesn’t feel right, and there will be lots and lots of friction, which equals an ouchy time.

Lube was literally made for anal sex and penetration- it’s not a suggestion but more of a recommendation. When exploring possible lube options, remember that silicone lubes are not compatible with silicone sex toys, which include dildos and vibrating anal toys. You can, however, use a water-based product that basically does the same thing, except it won’t destroy your precious strap-on device.

A Strap-On Harness and Dildo

You’ll have a bit more freedom when choosing a harness and dildo to use in anal play. Your options will either be a strap-on, or a toy that includes both harness and dildo, or separately. What you pick will ultimately depend on your level of experience and preference.

Beginners can jump right in with a specially-made strap-on and a bottle of lube. If you want to customize and experiment, then you can buy a harness you fancy and a dildo that has the features you’d want. Luckily, there are plenty of options on the world wide web, but you should still choose wisely.

A harness and dildo, or a strap-on is the heart of pegging. Should you both enjoy the experience then you’d better invest in a high-quality dildo, strap on, or harness.

Compatible BDSM Sex Toys (Optional)

The act of pegging is specific, but there’s nothing in the rule book that says you can’t add a blindfold or some cuffs, for instance. It will help to envision what you will be doing, then fill in the gaps.

You can make the dildo into a high-tech sex machine, with parts that can vibrate or pleasure the p-spot. Alternatively, there’s a thrusting dildo that can do the work, or a ball gag to further highlight the submissive aspects of this play. The rest is really up to the imagination.

Safety Tips for Pegging (Both Sides)

The anus isn’t the usual go-to hole for sexual penetration, hence the need for a slow and steady approach. Safety is actually key to an enjoyable pegging experience for both sides, with more caution given to the receiver.

Here’s a short rundown of the roles and what’s expected of them.

The Giver

The ‘giver’ is the one who will wear the strap-on or harness, and also the one who will ‘penetrate’ the anus using a dildo. In the BDSM scenario, you will be the dominant partner who will lead and control the pace.

Givers should have both ears open for any concerns or discomfort that may come from the receiver. More often than not there will be a safe word you both will agree upon beforehand. To ease into the act, you may need to massage the prostate or finger the anus to make the receiver relax.

Remember to lube up and keep on doing so from start to finish. At any time it feels dry, take a moment and splash some on the dildo or your fingers. You can only get into the thick of the action if the receiver says they’re ready.

The Receiver

The receiver will be doing a lot of feeling, with most of the action on their end in a normal pegging play. While the submissive is mostly waiting for the dom on the pace, they should feel comfortable in communicating what they want or when things start getting out of control.

Anal play and penetration come with a few risks, namely infections and roughage. That said, you should go ahead and take a shower beforehand, making sure to clean the anus part. The same goes for the dildo or strap-on. They should be cleaned using soap and warm water and allowed to air dry before use.

BDSM aftercare will be integral to a pegging experience, especially if it’s the first time you’re both doing it. Aftercare can mean the difference between a one-time thing and wanting to peg again on the next play session. Light some candles, spoon, wash up, rehydrate, make a meaningful conversation, and so on.

How to Start Pegging

Prepare the Materials

Now that you have a special day in mind, it’s time to gather the toys you’ll need for the session. By now you’ll have decided if you want to customize with a harness and dildo of your choice, or kept it simple and bought a strap-on instead.

This can also be the time you buy a compatible lube and extra accessories, such as a blindfold, cuffs, and other restraints, or maybe a male masturbator to simulate a threesome. Once the items arrive, read the manual thoroughly and charge them up to full, and feel free to explore the features and see how they work.

Wash Up, Get Clean and In Character

Both individuals should wash up and pay attention to their private parts while in the shower. Also in BDSM play partners usually assume a role, and it can be a wildly different persona than what they do on a daily basis. The receiver can take extra time as they’ll be the submissive partner in this scenario.

Ease into the Penetration

A slow fingering or anal stimulation may be required before penetrating with the dildo. You can use a glove to get inside and locate the prostrate or the p-spot. Lube up with this every step of the way, and communicate with your partner and ask how they feel.

After the receiver is comfortable and ready for the dildo, ease the toy in until they are satisfied. Then, depending on what you talked about, play through the scenario or add some sex devices along the way.

Continue and Finish

Now is the time to get into position and assume either a doggy style or a lifted missionary. The receiver will have fully adjusted and be receptive to all the action that’s about to take place. Continue until both finishes, and get into pegging aftercare immediately.

You may tend to your partner’s comfort needs as their anal region might be sore. Clean up, wash the devices with soap and warm water, and engage in pillow talk or when you want to do it again.

Pegging FAQs

How Can You Talk Someone Into Pegging?

First of all, introduce the topic of pegging in a one-on-one setting. Ease your way into it when your partner is relaxed and open to suggestions. You can lead with benefits, such as a new thing in the bedroom or something that you’d really want to try. All that, however, boils down to whether your partner is okay with it or not. If they don’t want it, don’t force it.

Is Pegging Painful?

Done right, pegging is an exciting and painless sexual experience. The key to doing proper pegging is to lead with an anal massage or fingering before introducing the dildo. Lube is absolutely essential here- don’t start without it, and keep it flowing from start to finish.

Why Do People Love Pegging?

Pegging was once an exclusive domain but has long since opened to include everyone who wants to try it. That said, the feeling that comes with dominating is one of the main reasons to try pegging, as is guys who want to get their prostates stimulated into orgasm.

Is Pegging Part of BDSM?

Pegging partly belongs in the BDSM niche as there’s a clear domination and submissive power balance in the act. This gets enhanced when the receiver is bound, gagged, or tied up in a way that they can’t move without the dom’s permission. However, it can also be a free-flowing sexual act without any restraints whatsoever.

What Sex Toys Do I Need to Start Pegging?

The two basic items in pegging are lube and a strap-on dildo. To spice up the act further, you can get into the BDSM category and get some rope, cuffs, whips, and maybe some blindfolds. Or, you can fulfill your fantasy with a sex doll torso, vibrator, or another strap-on for mind-bending fun. With each toy you bring to the bedroom make sure you have your partner’s consent.