Anal Fingering 101, Including the Do’s and Don’ts and Best Techniques
What is Anal Fingering?
Anal fingering is not that much different from vaginal fingering. It’s a push-in, pull-out kind of thing, albeit done more slowly and deliberately due to the anus being more sensitive and prone to injury.
Finding out all the pleasurable nerve spots in the anus region is the primary reason to try anal fingering and penetration. Despite its main function of eliminating waste from the body, there’s a kind of a ‘sweet spot’, like the p-spot for men, that adventurers can experience.
So, to finger the anal region you obviously need a finger. Other important things include sex-safe lubricant you can buy at a reputable sex toy shop, as well as a pair of gloves that are safe for this kind of activity. Latex or medical-grade gloves should be enough to do the trick.
If we aren’t strict about the term ‘anal fingering’, then we can say that anal penetration or using sex toys for anal pleasure are the same thing.
The Difference Between Pussy Fingering and Ass Fingering
Believe it or not, there are several main differences when it comes to anal fingering and pussy fingering, mainly the pace and depth.
It’s probably safe to say that in pussy fingering, fast and furious is considered the normal pace. After all, the objective here is to simulate penetrative sex and achieve an orgasm. The more times an object, such as a penis or a sex toy, hits the vagina, the better it is for the receiver. However, due to the absence of the g-spot, the anus works a bit differently.
The best approach to anal fingering is to think of it like oral sex in women. Go too fast and your tongue and mouth will fatigue, and it won’t be as intense or as pleasurable as your woman would like. Go deliberate and slow, and take into account their erogenous zones and reaction is the key to great fellatio (and apparently, anal fingering).
6 Anal Fingering Tips and Techniques to Try
Locate the Pleasure Spot
The first and perhaps the most important step in ass fingering is to find the pleasure spot. Take the time and be patient enough and you’ll be rewarded in the process. However, you should keep in mind that the ‘sweet spot’ varies from one person to another.
Most of the time the pleasure centers in the anus are one or two inches deep. Yep, you can breathe a sigh of relief knowing that you won’t have to venture very far to get your partner all hot and bothered, but this shouldn’t mean that you poke your finger in there and expect to get it right the first time.
After lubing up and putting on gloves, go ahead and do an inch-length poke, then see how your partner reacts. You may want to give a heads-up or slowly circle around the rim as a sort of precursor as well.
Do a ‘Come Hither’ Motion
Once you’ve locked on to the sweet spot, it’s time for stimulation. Drawing comparisons to vaginal fingering and oral sex, the best motion is the ‘come hither’, where you slightly curl the finger upward or downward and revert back to the original pointing position.
Again, the direction in which you’ll do it will depend on where the pleasure nerves are and the position the receiver is in. You might need to curl downward or upward if they’re lying prone or on their back, and the reverse direction if they’re in doggy-style position.
To spice things up you can change the pace ever so slightly, or add a bit more pressure against the tissue lining. You’ll know if this is what your partner wants when they start moaning or expressing their pleasure.
Long and Slow Does the Trick
We said it once but we’ll say it again- anal play is a marathon and not a sprint. You won’t get anywhere if you take it the same as regular sex. While it’s possible to orgasm solely on anal play alone, the experience is better with a combination of butt fingering and g-spot stimulation or penetrative sex.
Tickle and Massage
At this point you may feel like a master at anal fingering, but there’s more to learn. There are other motions you can employ, such as massaging and tickling the erogenous zone to elicit a positive reaction from your partner.
Tickling is a motion where you curve your finger slightly and complete a firmer press. On the other hand, you can assume a small circular motion around the nerve ending to switch it up. Get your head in the anal game and take into account your partner’s reactions so you’ll know which feels best for them.
This technique is probably the fastest pace you can do for anal fingering. Any more and you run the risk of micro-tears and injuries. While there are some that are open to having the same pace as anal penetration, don’t assume and ask your partner what he or she prefers.
Use a Sex Toy
Elevate anal play to a whole new level with anal sex toys. Aside from simplifying the motions, these sex toys are designed to seek out pleasurable nerve endings in the anal region and consistently hit those spots to bring you closer to climax.
Anal adult products can be shorter than full-on penetrative devices, including dildos and vibrators because it doesn’t need to be super deep. As always, your and your partner’s preferences may vary, and you can always opt for a bigger adult toy if you want.
When using a sex toy it’s best to read and understand the manual before you proceed. Test it out on the skin first, and start at the lowest setting for vibrating or thrusting so you can get acclimated to the feeling.
Add More Fingers
A single finger is usually enough to get the job done, anal-wise. However, there’s no rule in trying out new things, such as poking with two or even three fingers. Make sure to give your partner a verbal heads-up so they won’t be in for a rude surprise.
Do the same process for additional fingers- lube them up before attempting entry even if the anus is already nice and slippery. Go from one to two, then three if the session calls for it. Gradual adjustment is the key to a nice session and minimal aftercare when it’s over.
And yes, you can attempt to put a finger as well as a sex toy if it fits. Observe proper precautions and always be mindful of your partner’s reactions. Open up to new experiences by having the inserted fingers do a ‘come hither’ motion, or massage and tickle a wider area inside. Experiment to see what feels best for the receiver, and keep doing it until you’re ready to finish or move on to the main attraction.
Anal Fingering Safety Precautions
Cut Your Nails
The safer you are in anal fingering, the better. This precaution works both ways- the receiver won’t have to worry about long nails damaging their insides, while the giver won’t have any micro-substance stuck under their nails.
As an added bonus, short nails won’t cut out of the gloves and present a surprise to the receiver. It only takes five minutes or so to cut all your fingernails down to size. Once done, give them a quick wash with soap and water and you’re good to go.
Take a Bath or a Quick Shower
We can’t stress cleaning your bum before play enough, so here’s a dedicated section. Aside from your usual ritual of scrubbing, you should pay attention to your bottom. Soap and water should do the trick, and you won’t have to spend half an hour getting everything sparkly clean down there.
Give your butt a quick sniff check before entering the bedroom. Alternatively, you can use an enema bulb or something similar as a quick anal rinse. Load up the reservoir with room temperature water and allow it to pass the colon.
Double Check Your Bedroom Equipment
By bedroom equipment we mean the things you’ll be using for the anal play. Is everything ready and available within reach? Also, prepare for any mishap that can happen along the way. Have a first-aid kit handy and plenty of towels on hand.
Do a quick inspection before proceeding. Both of you should have an idea of where to go to wash up and clean yourselves. If possible, have two tubes or bottles of lube and an extra pair of latex gloves.
Communicate
Communication is vital if you both want to have a good time. It doesn’t have to be a journal of how the receiver is feeling every step of the way, but keeping an open line and an open ear will allow you to both enjoy yourselves during anal fingering.
The receiver should be more vocal because it’s their body after all. Provide a verbal signal if the action feels nice or if there’s something that can be improved. Furthermore, the receiver should be able to tell if they’re not comfortable or in pain. Talking is important when it comes to aftercare time as well so they can be open about their feelings post-session.
Anal Fingering Aftercare
Aftercare is mostly washing up and cleaning- a quick bathroom or shower should suffice. Make sure to wash your hands as well, and any sex toys you may have used during your anal play. Then, don’t forget to set aside time to converse about what happened. The receiver may want to express their feelings about the anal activity and if they want to do it again in the future.
Anal Penetration FAQs
Can I Go Straight to Anal Penetration without Fingering?
Yes, you can go straight to anal penetration without the finger dip, but there’s a higher chance that it will be an uncomfortable experience. Also, you will need consent to do this, as well as give the receiver enough time to prepare for anal, like washing or taking a shower.
Why Do People Like Anal Fingering?
There are many reasons to try anal fingering. Couples might be curious as to how it feels like, or they may feel like they need to get out of a slump. Fact-wise, the anus has some unique nerve endings that can feel pleasurable when stimulated. Sex toys are perhaps the easiest way to experiment with anal play.
How to Convince My Partner to Try Ass Play?
The best way to convince someone to try anal play is to have a proper sit-down and talk things out. Lay out the benefits and the reason why you want to do anal fingering or butt play and listen to their response. Should they decline, respect their decision and try not to be persistent until they open the topic on their own accord.
Do I Need to Shower Before/After Anal Fingering?
We wholly recommend washing up or taking a quick shower prior to any anal play for hygienic purposes. This increases the chance of having an enjoyable experience from start to finish.
Is Anal Fingering Safe?
As long as you observe proper precautions and are focused then anal fingering is generally safe. Remember to lube up and go slow and steady to reduce the risks of bacterial infection or micro-tears. Also, don’t put your finger into the vagina after playing in the anus region unless you’ve washed it thoroughly.
Can I Use Sex Toys for Anal?
Sure, why not? If you want a more hands-off approach and want a sex toy to do the work, then that is okay. However, we recommend a gloved finger and lube to start, as it’s smaller and can ease you right into anal action.
Slow and Steady Wins the Orgasmic Race with Anal Fingering
Excited about exploring the unknown with anal fingering? We’re happy for you. Anal can be a fun and memorable experience for everyone involved. Who knows, you might like it so much that you’ll want to do it again!
